Writing this blog was a doozy, to say the least. I still believe that F.R.I.E.N.D.S. is one of the greatest shows ever made – technically, it was the third sitcom I had ever watched, after How I Met Your Mother and The Office. Remember the one-of-the-greatest part? It is one of the greatest, but nothing trumps The Office. None! In case you counter, whatever you argue is a moo point. On the other hand, I recently finished Avatar: The Last Airbender and Legend of Korra less than a month ago, and I went as far as reading the comics! (I didn’t know they had comics!).


If you haven’t read it, read it here: The “F” Word – Friends.


I have had a brainware update, and first things first, I still don’t believe in the concept of “best friends”. I find it too heavy, putting too much pressure on one person. Close friends work for me, but not best friends. Having one person who knows you inside out is fun, but no one ever seems to talk about the expectations that come with that. Essentially, you have one person to be your fighter, supporter, community, accomplice, and everything.

For the record, I am extrapolating specific fragments from Trevor Noah’s conversation with Simon Sinek. For argument’s sake, having a single “best” friend means you shift all the expectations and all of the love and support from a community of friends and move it into one person. I mean, just ask yourself this: do you have a friend you can talk shit to about one friend who’s acting up? It’s healthy, by the way!

Essentially, one best friend must be the place of your purpose, community, social life, religious beliefs, political views, and everything else on the planet! Basically, you need one person to fulfill every desire you have! And to make it more unreasonable and unfair, asking them to be everything, everywhere, all the time, and always, yet you’re not even dating!

And also, if you have a best friend, are you their best friend, too? This makes me more skeptical because if you are my best friend and I am not yours, heh! I don’t know how we will survive. 

For the record, my woman is my best friend, and I’m Gracie’s best friend, so relax!

Gracie
Gracie back when he didn’t know how to jump through windows

However, I have my favorite people on this planet. I have a close friend I play FIFA with whenever we get the chance, another I attend concerts with, one at work who always has my back, another I share extra food with, several I go to church with, two I love reading their blogs,  a couple we’ve drifted apart, one I was born within the same 28 hours, one I try different hangout spots with, one I just like walking around town aimlessly with, one we hate the government passionately with, one movie buff who keeps me on my toes with watch-lists, one we share music with, one crazier than I, one we share books with, several we email back and forth, one we don’t need to talk all the time but we just get each other; the list goes on. Now, tell me, wouldn’t you implode if I were to put all this pressure on you?

My words still ring true: another close friend of mine went through a horrendous friendship breakup that needed a 25-minute voice note to get it out of her chest. Yes, friendships cause heàrtbreaks too, though it might be mild for some, but hell for others. Let’s just say I felt her pain, and I still do. I wouldn’t wish that on my worst enemy. 

Update: Currently, I haven’t saved anyone with an emoji unless we normally have business transactions between us, then this comes in “💵” – I have only saved one person with an emoji in my phone, and that’s the woman I write hand-written letters to. 

Lautrec Les Deux amies By Henri Marie Raymond de Toulouse-Lautrec from Fine Art America
L’abandon Les Deux amies (1895)

From Me to You

Funny enough, for the first time in my life, I knew three people whose birthdays were on the same day – two were people I knew, and one was a close friend, so you can guess who got all my attention. For the remaining November babies, I hope you don’t get rained on this month. If you’re cuddling, may you get pregnant (I sleep alone nowadays)? May your socks never smell and your phone never hangs mid-call. Also, may you never get sick this month, and your food always be tasty. 

What are you waiting for if you haven’t subscribed to my blog? If you have, please share it with all your best friends – I want to hear their honest opinions! 

Have you not had enough of my stories? Here’s my previous one, where I wrote about how scary it is to be a woman in a man’s world: Shame Needs To Change Sides.

Art: Lautrec Les Deux amies By Henri Marie Raymond de Toulouse-Lautrec from Fine Art America.

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7 Comments

  1. Ianaluda November 10, 2024 at 11:43 pm

    🔥

    Reply
  2. podahpek November 11, 2024 at 5:09 pm

    25 minutes voice note 😂. Uweeh. But I concur 💯. It’s difficult having that one person whom you will say is your best friend. I think after primary school I never had a best friend. I dreaded compositions and Inshas back then but when I was told to write about my best friend(rafiki mpendwa) man I was ready armed with the ABCs of our friendship. Now I don’t have that one friend, but sure I have few close friends.

    Reply
    1. Lesley Chacha - Site Author November 12, 2024 at 10:24 am

      😂😂😂I see ulipewa character development ya “best friendship”

      The close friends will always come through😂💯

      Reply
  3. Wairimu Kinyua November 11, 2024 at 9:12 pm

    Here for all Gracie’s feature. Fun fact booom I know two people who we share a birthday with

    Reply
    1. Lesley Chacha - Site Author November 12, 2024 at 10:26 am

      😂😂😂They grow up so fast🤧

      😂😂so that makes it 5 people born on the same day? What was happening in March?💀

      Reply
  4. mexluttah November 17, 2024 at 9:23 am

    Fun fact: I’m one of those people who suffer more severe friendship breakups/ issues as compared to relationship issues.

    I’m more likely to get depressed or even die from a friendship heartbreak. Oooh I’ve died before.

    Anyway different POV, we have friends for all occassions but there’s one who cuts across all occasions. They’re like the black top you’re aways wearing- the one you prefer to wash and wear even though an entire closet of clothes is clean. They’re not the only one, they’re just the favorite one. I don’t call mine my best friend (she has a best friend who isn’t me- she was there before me and all… 😂😂
    I call her my best of friends. (Sshhh I also have a best friend who was there before her).

    It’s just a title.

    Reply
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